Sunday, January 8, 2012

Introducing @snow_shoveler

What wild, wacky, warm, winter weather we've witnessed!

This must be the January thaw. But aside from the storm that I wrote about in my last post, we haven't had much to thaw out from.

The welcomest sight that I ever saw
Is a December snow, with a January thaw.
The most welcome thing that I've ever seen
Is a Christmas that's white, and a New Year that's green.

Therefore, I'm still unable to chronicle any of my shoveling exploits thus far. However, I will carry on with my blog, writing about whatever comes to mind.

You know, many people have asked me, "What does it take to be a contributing writer for Snow Shoveling In Canada?"

The answer is simple: You must have the "ability" to write epic "poetry". As well, you must have an unusual sense of the usual. In addition, you must be able to spell words like rhinocerous, rhinoseros, rinho, rhinho, hippopatomus, hippo. Finally, you must be a male fifty-something resident of Minikin Ontario with too much time on his hands.

Because of the dearth of snow on the earth, I've had time to set up a Twitter account. Of course, tweeting is easier than blogging as I've related before.  That's not to say that tweeting isn't tricky. You  have such a short space in which to express yourself that you often run out of room and end up with posts like these:

Yesterday I heard the funniest joke of all time. A guy walks into a bar with a meerkat on a leash and a bandicoot on his shoulder. He says "

Perhaps I haven't got the hang of this tweeting just yet. Let's try this again. A guy walks into a bar with a meerkat on a leash and a bandi

For those who are looking for prosperity and wealth beyond your wildest imagination, here is a secret that you need to know. First, you must

I've discovered the meaning of life!!! Incredible!!!! It's so obvious, so easy. Listen up world, and be enlightened. The meaning of life is

You get the picture. 

Heed this advice:

If you have a craving to tweet,
Remember  keep words short and sweet.
Just write about stuff
That is trivial fluff
And you’ll join the Twitter elite.

So I'll leave you with this final tweet: When you find yourself down in the dumps and are in desperate need of a smile to brighten your day, remember these wise and wonderful words,


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